It’s almost time for me to be in bed and it has been a complicated weekend. I am tired and worried and feeling a little disconnected. What made the weekend difficult is not important for this post, what is important is that the deepest of those feelings are about faith and about thanksgiving.
Our faith is constantly tested in this life. Faith in God, in humanity, in the love we have and the friendships we treasure. Faith, by it’s very nature, requires constant testing. It’s fragile and resilient. And the testament to our faith is the ability to call forth some measure of it, even when we most fear our faith is breaking.
That measure of faith is the beginning of all our feelings of gratitude and thankfulness. The fact that we question those things which mean the most to us, and are capable of returning to our feelings of belief and trust is reassuring. It is a gift. It allows us to feel a full range of emotions, to rage against the unfair aspects of life without losing that which makes us our best. Without losing our ability love and and believe in each other.
I am constantly amazed at the inner strength we have, and thankful that as fragile as my faith often is, it is strong enough to sustain through the most difficult of days.